Responses to the “You Can’t Handle The Truth” entry
About a week ago I made a blog entry titled, “You Can’t Handle TheTruth.”
I got some feedback on that entry, so I decided to talk a little bit about it:
I can’t believe that you posted that. It really is harsh and you come across as very negative and cynical. Even if it is the truth, it is really mean.
-Ivonne
Ivonne, thanks for the feedback. I understand that it does sound negative and cynical. Then again, show me a trainer that has been working with overweight housewives for several years that ISN’T negative and cynical. I don’t know what it is about that population, but they really drain the hell out of you. Oh wait, I do know what it is about that population but I don’t want to sound “really mean.”
In all honesty, I don’t think the statements were mean. They weren’t meant to be mean or hurtful towards anyone. The intention of the post was to voice an opinion that many people in this field have…People who don’t want to work hard and complain SUCK. They are a drag to work with and you shouldn’t have to put up with them. I sure as hell don’t want to. Most people get in this field with the intention of helping others reach their goals and attain optimal health (with the exception of a few, like myself, that get into it to work with athletic populations and work towards a specific goal or competition). It is really upsetting to show up at work everyday with the idea that you want to help change someone’s life, only that person doesn’t want it as much as you do (AND IT IS THEIR LIFE!). How can you get excited about that? I know I don’t.
I don’t mind working with weekend warriors or general population clients, as long as they come in knowing that we are going to WORK and not play games. When they start annoying me, they have got to go.
I really do wonder what would happen if they did hear the truth? I wonder if these very same people have walked through life without people being straight up honest with them. Their families and friends have made excuses for them or felt bad for saying something. Maybe we are all at fault here for being too gentle, too politically correct, and too damn dishonest with them.
-Nick
Nick thanks for your reply. I agree 100%. Their families and friends have made excuses for them their entire lives. They have allowed them to be lazy and go through life acting like nothing is their fault. It is always someone else’s fault that they are overweight and out of shape. No one takes responsibilities.
I think we may be a little at fault for being too gentle with them and to politically correct. I mean, what is the worst that happens if we told them the truth? Maybe that would actually light a fire under their ass to get up and do something. If I am going to be working with an athlete and I tell him something like “wow, you are pretty athletic but you are weak as a kitten,” or “your work capacity really sucks.” Do you think they want to hear that? If anything, they want to do whatever it takes to improve. Their question is along the lines of “What do I have to do to get better? That is why I am here.” So maybe you tell “miss insanely obese twenty something year old” that she is 50-pounds over fat and totally deconditioned. Maybe for once in her life, she would say “Your right. I am not happy with my body. Help me make it better.” I think that when working with these people the first step is making them see what their problem is, and the second step is making them commit to a concrete goal and then give 100% effort to get there.
It's a damn shame is what it is - I wish I had that kind of money where I could afford to train with a good trainer.
Obviously I do what I can thanks to IM forums, but it's still nothing compared to what I could be doing with someone who does it for a living.
-Dan
Dan thanks for writing in. I applaud your efforts. Not only are you in the gym training yourself; but, you are reading and educating yourself on how to improve on what you are doing. Keep up the good work!
Thanks for the feedback everyone. Now that we have this squared away, I think my next few entries will be back to training and discussing some program design ideas.
Until next time,
Patrick
I got some feedback on that entry, so I decided to talk a little bit about it:
I can’t believe that you posted that. It really is harsh and you come across as very negative and cynical. Even if it is the truth, it is really mean.
-Ivonne
Ivonne, thanks for the feedback. I understand that it does sound negative and cynical. Then again, show me a trainer that has been working with overweight housewives for several years that ISN’T negative and cynical. I don’t know what it is about that population, but they really drain the hell out of you. Oh wait, I do know what it is about that population but I don’t want to sound “really mean.”
In all honesty, I don’t think the statements were mean. They weren’t meant to be mean or hurtful towards anyone. The intention of the post was to voice an opinion that many people in this field have…People who don’t want to work hard and complain SUCK. They are a drag to work with and you shouldn’t have to put up with them. I sure as hell don’t want to. Most people get in this field with the intention of helping others reach their goals and attain optimal health (with the exception of a few, like myself, that get into it to work with athletic populations and work towards a specific goal or competition). It is really upsetting to show up at work everyday with the idea that you want to help change someone’s life, only that person doesn’t want it as much as you do (AND IT IS THEIR LIFE!). How can you get excited about that? I know I don’t.
I don’t mind working with weekend warriors or general population clients, as long as they come in knowing that we are going to WORK and not play games. When they start annoying me, they have got to go.
I really do wonder what would happen if they did hear the truth? I wonder if these very same people have walked through life without people being straight up honest with them. Their families and friends have made excuses for them or felt bad for saying something. Maybe we are all at fault here for being too gentle, too politically correct, and too damn dishonest with them.
-Nick
Nick thanks for your reply. I agree 100%. Their families and friends have made excuses for them their entire lives. They have allowed them to be lazy and go through life acting like nothing is their fault. It is always someone else’s fault that they are overweight and out of shape. No one takes responsibilities.
I think we may be a little at fault for being too gentle with them and to politically correct. I mean, what is the worst that happens if we told them the truth? Maybe that would actually light a fire under their ass to get up and do something. If I am going to be working with an athlete and I tell him something like “wow, you are pretty athletic but you are weak as a kitten,” or “your work capacity really sucks.” Do you think they want to hear that? If anything, they want to do whatever it takes to improve. Their question is along the lines of “What do I have to do to get better? That is why I am here.” So maybe you tell “miss insanely obese twenty something year old” that she is 50-pounds over fat and totally deconditioned. Maybe for once in her life, she would say “Your right. I am not happy with my body. Help me make it better.” I think that when working with these people the first step is making them see what their problem is, and the second step is making them commit to a concrete goal and then give 100% effort to get there.
It's a damn shame is what it is - I wish I had that kind of money where I could afford to train with a good trainer.
Obviously I do what I can thanks to IM forums, but it's still nothing compared to what I could be doing with someone who does it for a living.
-Dan
Dan thanks for writing in. I applaud your efforts. Not only are you in the gym training yourself; but, you are reading and educating yourself on how to improve on what you are doing. Keep up the good work!
Thanks for the feedback everyone. Now that we have this squared away, I think my next few entries will be back to training and discussing some program design ideas.
Until next time,
Patrick
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